Are You a Good Listener?

Are you a good listener? It is not something that a lot of people are really that great at doing. Our society has morphed into a “me only” focus with no consideration of others so it can be very difficult for a person to commit to listening first and speaking second. In fact, I would argue, that it is one of the least favorite things to do in communication, is to listen. The problem with that thinking is that to communicate well you need to be able to listen.

There are too many jokes about guys not listening to their wives and getting in trouble. In our culture, we have even made a joke about “selective hearing” when it comes to relationships. 

The Bible even talks about the priority of listening when it comes to relationships in James 1:19 that says;

19 Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry.

The listening referenced in this verse is not just for the sake of being aware of audible sounds but “hearing with understanding” that takes priority over responses or reactions in the physical realm. Just think about what our world would look like if we actually practiced this principle of patiently hearing first, not formulating an immediate emotional response, and not letting our emotions run our minds.

I can say that in all my years of interacting with all ages and kinds of people, that a listening ear has lead to deeper conversations and changed lives far more than any verbal sparring. Listening draws people in to you and lets them know, non-verbally, that you respect what they are saying. It doesn’t mean you have to agree with what they say but it gives you a place a position to speak God’s truth in love at just the right moment. 

Today, be a quick listener and slow speaker and watch how the relationships in your life change for the better.